Here are the first five:

1. Choose carefully. If more than one friend or family member or friend is telling you to watch out, you’d better!

2. Don’t keep secrets. Listen to each others darkest fears, and deepest hopes.

3. Respect his family. Respect her family. You are now one family.

4. Say “I’m sorry, I was wrong” when you need to.

5. Forgive instantly. Don’t hold grudges; they spoil quickly.

“All the world’s a stage” said the bard who imagined a fantasy wedding to rival  today’s standards in The Midsummer Night’s Dream. If you dream of staging your wedding to your wildest dreams, you don’t have to let price stop you! A little extra planning and ingenuity will deliver the atmosphere you want and you can thank – well, you can thank yourself!

Ways to cut costs:

Borrow decor from friends and family. It all adds up to easy clean-up if you ask each one to take their own things home.

Buy decorations that you can use again. (For example: fabric for centerpieces can be purchased linen napkins.)

Along the same line, if you absolutely love  for example, wrought iron, or orchids you can purchase items for your wedding decor that can be used in your new home.

Decide where you want to splurge, and cut costs elsewhere. That exclusive cake cutting set that catches your eye might not give you as much satisfaction for the money as a lighted gobi monogram for the dance floor.

Use paper/plastic/wood for things that will get thrown away anyway. (There are amazing new table service products that are beautiful and disposable, eliminating paying  a caterer to wash the dishes.)

If you have a lot of time, and you plan ahead, you can make a lot of your own decorations, or you can simplify. Several large eye-popping accent areas have more impact than lots of little cluttery objects.

Consider using photos of you and your groom and family as children in place of centerpieces of flowers.

Lots of color can draw the eye towards it. Fabric and paper, in their “raw forms” are inexpensive and cost less purchased at a craft or fabric store rather then rented from a party store. Enlist a friend to hem them for you, if you are not handy with a sewing machine.

Carefully limit your guest list, or have your reception by invitation only. That means more people get to come to the ceremony but only a chosen few celebrate with you at the reception.

Remember, the guests you invite are those who love you and want to see you get married. Don’t be intimidated, but rather let your own personal style craft the mood you want to set.

Part 2: Eat, drink and save money!

A celebration should include some form of imbibing, but don’t succumb to the pressure to feed your guests a Roman feast.  You will want to consider a ballpark amount per guest that includes a drink and food component. The sky is your limit, as to choices, as even traditional wedding cake is no longer very traditional.

Food:

Re-think the sit-down meal. The food you serve can be the most flexible part of a wedding budget, as the cost generally goes up or down with the number of guests you have, and the cost of the food itself. Here are some options that are lighter on the wallet. If you’re not opting for traditional choices this lighter fare works especially well if you schedule your wedding so that it sidesteps regular mealtimes (1pm, or 7pm for example). Just be sure to plan to feed yourself and your wedding party a few hours before the ceremony.

Consider a buffet-style menu with the following choices:

Taco bar

Baked or Mashed Potato bar

Sandwich bar with sliced meats and cheeses (you can splurge on condiments and garnishes)

Fancy sandwiches such as cucumber or chicken salad

Individual fondue pots at tables with veggies, or bread for dipping

Gourmet pizzas

Cheese and cracker bar

Tapas  (assortment of bite-sized savories)

Popcorn bar with sweet and savory additions

Pasta bar (This can be ‘up’ or ‘down’ on the gourmet scale from marinara to scallops as toppings

Drinks:

Drinks, alcoholic and non-alcoholic can really add up. Consider the following before you spring for unlimited drinks on the house.

A signature drink, poured by a bartender , or tended by a friend, can personalize your wedding, express your individual style, and keep the amount of mixers you must buy to a minimum.  This can also be a non-alcoholic drink such as a milkshake or malt in the flavor(s) of your choice.

An eclectic mix of bargain wines on the tables (allow one bottle per every 4- 5 adults) can turn into a wine-tasting experience for your guests. Don’t feel you have to serve all the same brand.

A chip system (where each guest receives a number of  chips-you determine the number-to be traded at the bar for drinks) will serve two purposes. You will not waste drinks, and no one will drink too much. This also eliminates (as far as possible) minors getting drinks.

Toasting with champagne is customary, but you can toast with whatever is in your glass at the time. Simply notify your DJ or coordinator to give the guests notice in time to have their glasses filled.

Many a reception can go sour when “Uncle Benny” has too much. If you fear this is possible at your wedding, there’s no rule that says you must serve alcohol. Soda, punch, sparkling water, and specialty iced teas are a nice alternative, while keeping costs down, as most venues require security guards, at an extra expense, whenever alcohol is served.

Let them eat cake-or cupcakes, or brownies…the possibilities for sidestepping the traditional cake are virtually endless.

Coffee bar with cookies and pirouttes

Candy bar, in the colors of your wedding, or multi-colored

Brownie bar

Ice cream bar

Cookie bar

Cake pops

“Cake tiers” made with any number of sweets-candy bars, ethnic sweets, cookies, and even fruit, can be a fun nod to the traditional

In essence, whatever you like becomes the treat you give to your guests.

Often, the presentation of the food is what makes ordinary celebratory. Even little hamburgers, served in tiers on beds of lettuce can be festive. The addition of extras, such as umbrella picks, or ruffled toothpicks in finger foods can deliver visual punch with little expense.

Resist the urge to copy or live up to the wedding of your peers. Instead spend some time talking to your groom about the type of wedding that reflects you as a couple. Pleasing other people with isn’t as important as pleasing the one you’re going to spend the rest of your life with.

Welcome to our three part blog:
 Ideas for Receptions on Small Budgets: Some tidbits to help you soar through your planning

Part 1: Choosing Your Venue

If you happen to be operating within a limited budget, (and who isn’t?) you don’t need to be limited in creativity. In fact, this is a perfect opportunity to let your imagination loose! We were salivating just writing this blog, and we’re sure you will be too! Here are some alternative options to ‘renting out the Ritz-Carlton’.

-Use a friend’s back yard. Most of us know someone with a roomy, well groomed yard area. You can even offer to plant a few new flowers and plants to spruce up the area. Most people with a well-groomed backyard are proud to show it off! A gift certificate to a home and garden store would be a nice thank-you gift, in lieu of a small monetary gift

-Find a family ranch that will let you use their land/barn for a small fee. In the Modesto/Turlock/Oakdale area there are many small ranches that are beginning to open up their spaces on a limited basis. We know of one that only rents out several times a year. Call us for details.

-Plan your wedding date on a less popular day of the week or time of year. Most traditional venues are more reasonable on Fridays and Sundays rather than the typical Saturday wedding. The most popular and therefore pricey months of the year in the central valley are May, June, July, August and September. April and October weather can be very mild, but ‘iffy’ for storms, so be sure to check with your venue for weather contingencies, ie. Do they have a plan for heating an outdoor tent? Are there options indoors in the event that your outdoor ceremony is rained out? The winter months can provide the perfect opportunity for ‘cozy themes’.

The venue you choose must be a place where you feel comfortable. If you don’t feel that asking questions about how to lower your costs are welcome at a certain venue, don’t be intimidated. Ask anyway, or move on. Remember, you are the customer, and therefore the employer.

We would love to talk with you personally about some of our favorite venues.

Amy and Lana Maris
Wedding coordinators
Maris Media Productions
(209) 613 2890

The flowers are beautiful, the table settings lovely, the bridesmaids are stunning, the groom as handsome as ever. But if the bride ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.

If you’ve had the unfortunate experience of attending a wedding where the the bride was anywhere from out of sorts to out of control, you understand completely. Perhaps you’re afraid it could be you.

The following tips may help you head off a sinking feeling of regret that you will have on this, your most special day, if you succumb to the Bridezilla complex:

•  Plan, plan, plan – Know your expectations for the wedding day, and respectfully enlist help from your closest friends. Example –  Arrange ahead of time who will be bringing items to be used such as the cake serving set, etc. Do as much ahead of time as possible to avoid last minute catastrophes. Put phone numbers of vendors and wedding party in your phone for easy reference,  in case they run late, or you have a last minute question.
• Consider your groom’s needs. The wedding event is good practice for learning how best to love your new spouse. It doesn’t need to be a ‘bridefest’. Talk about it with him.
  
•  Don’t expect your bridesmaids to be your slaves. A moderate amount of tasks are expected. Don’t keep them up all night, or running all around town for you. See tip number 1.
•  Include someone whose relationship with you is soothing in your wedding party or to help you on your special day. Such people can be a balm for high stress moments. If any of your relatives are not ‘safe’ people, in other words, they bring stress to the relationship, consider giving them a smaller part in your day.
•  Eat and drink something healthy on your wedding day. A drop in blood sugar can make you feel extra cranky, and even cause dizziness and a tendency to faint. This is no time to tempt fate.
•   Hiring a wedding coordinator can significantly reduce the amount of work your family and your wedding party does. The logistics of the day can be removed from your mind, and you can enjoy the day. Added bonus: He or she can take the hit for being the one who has to tell Uncle Benny he must sit at the table with his exwife.
•   Determine beforehand that your mood will be positive, no matter what. 

                                                                     -A  happy bride is a beautiful bride-

Welcome to the flying bride, a blog for brides, and those who love them!

I am a bride of 25 years, and still counting. I am mother to four future brides of my own, and have guided scores of brides down the aisle. The flowing veil and train I release as it glides to  the waiting groom feels like a birth, every time!

I am married to a musician and DJ who provides most,  if not all of my technical support.

Visit here to hear stories, tips, and advice from my experiences and a few snafu’s to steer clear of!

I’d like to know what subjects you are interested in hearing about. Please feel free to offer suggestions for future topics.

Thanks to http://helloandrea.blogspot.com/2011/10/few-words-to-live-by.html for this inspiring quote!